I walked through the door this morning to pick up mom for her long day of treatment. I wasn't prepared to see mom the way she was.
I hadn't seen mom in over a week, but talked on the phone with her virtually every day. She looked thinner and more of her hair was gone. I also noticed that her eyes looked different somehow. Upon closer inspection, it seems the medication she is taking is causing her eyes to dilate and she has less eyelashes. It's amazing, however, how she really hasn't lost that much of her eyebrows or other body hair. I'm sure that will change in the coming weeks.
Mom's last day of chemo was today. For now. We saw the doctor and her blood pressure was normal and she weighed 172 pounds. She has lost 36 pounds in about a month and a half. But her mentality seems good and her attitude as well which I am grateful for.
I spoke with the person in Accounting to pull her help in trying to get an answer from Social Services as to the status of mom's Medicaid application. She was able to get through. The application was still sitting here waiting to be processed? Seriously??
The bottom line is this: Mom qualifies but she must meet $600 in out-of-pocket medical expenses each month before she qualifies for Medicaid for that month. So it's like having to meet a deductible first. Katrina (the Accounting person) said she had never heard a high pay down like that before. She has seen as low as $14 up to $200. She wondered how they came up with that figure. I told her that it may be from a chart I saw on their website. She printed it out and found a dollar amount that could be a factor (the amount on the chart is deducted from total income and the difference is the pay down amount). She and I were outraged that mom's pay down of $600 was so high. It constitutes about 1/2 of mom's total fixed income. For real?? But you can help low income families with 8 kids and provide everything for them virtually free but can't help and elderly person on a fixed income who pays her bills each month on time and has a mortgage and sustains herself on a limited monthly income?? I thought Medicaid reimbursed you for medical expense and didn't realize that this is how it worked. Katrina said mom was better off paying the 20% Medicare doesn't cover as it would be much cheaper. I tend to agree. In any case, I will be giving Katrina a copy of the application and backup documentation so that she can look at it more closely and try to help. At least social services is also trying to get Part D for mom to help cover the cost of prescriptions as she doesn't have coverage right now.
I kept looking at mom today and remembering the pretty, vibrant woman who used to be and wished still was. Emotionally I'm fine until I see mom. It's so difficult to remember how she used to be and how much, physically, she has changed. Like I have said before, I never noticed mom ageing...until this happened. She's looking frail and old to me. I want to turn back the clock. I see pictures on the wall and see her in various stages of her life and one picture of her in particular. As I stand there and look at the picture of her smiling, I say to mom, "I am this age now that you were then." It's so weird because as I see her age more than ever, I too see myself age. It's unnerving.
I told mom how proud of her I am. She has come a long way and has handled it emotionally and physically overall, very well. She's clinging onto hope that she is beating this thing or at least giving it a good beating, lol.
Two weeks from today she goes in for a two-week follow up. The doctor may do a cat scan to determine where we are at with the cancer mass. The weekly xrays she was getting at the radiation center was only so they could determine where/how to apply the treatment...not to see if the cancer was shrinking.
So we will have to be patient a little while longer. I hope we get good news in the long run.....
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